We are often encouraged to get over our sadness or any anger that we feel but sometimes ‘getting over’ something isn’t the easiest of things to do and when you think about it, maybe not the best thing to do either. Why aren’t we encouraged to work out what might be causing our sadness? Why are we not often told that it’s ok to be sad? Because that’s the truth, it’s ok to be sad and I feel like we need to hear this more often. We should be told to work out the reasoning behind our sadness and emotions rather than being encouraged to ignore it and ‘cheer up’ or ‘get over it’.
I must admit that the past few weeks haven’t been the easiest for me for reasons that I won’t go into but I have put so much pressure on myself to maintain a positive mindset and tried to push my worries, anxieties and troubles to one side but I soon realised that this wasn’t the healthiest of choices.
I feel like we all focus too much on thinking that being sad or not being ourselves is a bad thing but in reality that’s not the case. Have you ever thought that it might be healthy to not be ok every once in a while? That it’s important to acknowledge the fact that you’re sad and work towards feeling like yourself again rather than ignoring it and convincing yourself that everything is fine?
I focus so much on being positive no matter what the battle I’m facing and when I don’t feel positive or motivated to achieve something I feel so guilty for it therefore making things worse. I feel like not maintaining that positivity is a bad thing but in all honesty, it’s not. A positive mindset isn’t always the easiest of things to maintain and that’s ok because no one expects you to be positive and happy at all times. I feel like we should all focus on working on our sadness and tell ourselves that it’s ok to be sad, angry, frustrated and upset sometimes. No one’s life is perfect, we all face battles and have bad/down days and we should remember that.
I’ve had a couple of people telling me recently that they feel guilty for not being positive or when they feel like they can’t constantly fight the battle they’re facing, I’ve felt exactly the same. It’s easy to feel guilty when you have a good supporting network around you who are trying their best to make you happy and feel better, it’s easy to feel like you’re letting those people down if you’re not maintaining that positivity and happiness. But I’m here to tell you that you’re not letting anyone down when you’re having a bad day or even a bad week or few weeks. Those people you feel like you’re letting down will also have sad times and possibly feel bad or guilty for it too. There’s no shame in feeling sad or not being ok and we all need to keep this in mind whenever we’re going through a hard time. Everyone has a right not to be themselves.
If you’re going through a hard time then remember that you’re not alone, there are people out there who can support you, who want to be there for you. Don’t feel guilty for being sad or for not being ok. Try to focus and dedicate your time to working on the issues and becoming yourself again. I know being happy and maintaining a positive mindset isn’t easy and if there are deeper underlying problems then it might take a longer period of time to start feeling a little happiness again but as I said, the best thing you can do is concentrate on yourself, accept help from others who want to support you, focus on working on the reasoning behind your emotions and just remember that being sad isn’t a bad thing.
So this is your reminder that if you’re not feeling like yourself right now, if you feel like you’re failing, you’re not. Taking a step back and acknowledging the fact that you need time to work on yourself and your emotions is not a sign of failure, it’s not a sign of weakness. In fact, I think it’s the opposite to that, accepting that you’re not ok is a sign of courage and strength. Remember that you have the strength to fight whatever it is you’re facing. But some days just won’t be your day and you know what? That’s absolutely fine.
It’s ok not to be ok, remember that.